image text special

'even grass gets lonely', Group Show at darkZone, New Jersey

Falling asleep is hard. It’s amazing it happens at all. As a kid I would sit in bed, wide awake in the middle of the night, alternating my gaze between the ceiling and the wall. I thought about anything and everything, cycling through an endless rolodex of anxieties and insecurities. During these sessions I was usually accompanied by the family cat, who was cozily cradled in the negative space created by my legs. The two of us would lay there for hours; one of us perfectly at peace and one of us reliving the day’s social anxieties and forecasting tomorrow’s worst-case scenarios. As the minutes marched forward, I watched her sleep and caught myself wondering how it came so easily to her. I couldn’t understand it. What secret knowledge was matted in-between her fur and claws? I started to fantasize about how my life would be if I wasn’t human. If the night grew long enough, I even felt my joints shift while my pores opened large enough for strands of fur to break through. My pupils lost their roundness, becoming narrowed, as my body condensed, and a sharp tail splintered from the bottom of my spine. 

In my new body I would have no worries, I would shed my ailments as easily as I shed my fur; leaving the evidence of my liberation as loose and wispy sigils all over the house. I could be small enough to hide, to not be found or paid attention unless I sought it out, and it was acceptable. I missed my hands at first but learned to appreciate the tactile simplifications granted by my paws. If it really came to it, I had the ability to be entirely self-sufficient; hunting, feeding, grooming, housing...This house would do for now but there was a whole world to explore...but I don’t have time now because there are sun beams emerging in the kitchen. That warm yellow light revealed patterns in my fur I didn’t know were there. As I admired the shimmer across my body and traced the dust particles that danced in air before they landed on my whiskers, my eyelids became heavy... 

If there was only a way to wear that cat mask, maybe just for pretend or maybe to help relieve the aches of my humanness for a while. It might help me understand to soften the edges of harsh truths, to let go of things out of my control. My new body would be a walking memorial to my cast aside negativity. The circular logic in which I was mired, coated in a newly formed translucent film, allowed me to admire the distinct shapes and patterns of my oncoming adolescence. Life moved so slowly, and if I were a cat I could’ve enjoyed it more. 

13.11.20

Elizabeth Ferry, Pooneh Maghazehe, Maggie Myers

darkZone

'A sight to cover the site of impact', Off-Site project by Sierra Shooting Associ

'A Selene Blues' by Giulia Essyad at Fri Art Kunsthalle, Fribourg

'Disparaitre(Geneve)' by Ethan Assouline at Zabriskie Point, Geneva

'Kozel - Alkazar (Early Access)', Online Show for Zaazrak|Dornych experimental sp

'Black Tarantula' at Lungo Stura Lazio, Turin

'The Leaking Bodies Series' by Barbara Kapusta at Gianni Manhattan, Vienna

'(...) Ninfa' by Vincent Lo Brutto at Chapelle Saint-Jean, Mulhouse

'Indoor feelings, and single-door kennels in your soul' by Robert Roest with Cinn

'Istaqsinaayok' by Bradford Kessler at Kunsthalle Wichita

'Spans' by Olga Pedan at Jakob Forster, Rotterdam

'Show World Order' by Valentina Vaccarella at Other Subject, New York

Group Exhibition #1 at FR MoCA, Fall River

'Current assets' by Sebastian Hedevang at C.C.C., Copenhagen

'Follow the Rainbow', Group Show Curated by TZVETNIK at ISSMAG, Moscow

'PANHUMANO' by Calabash Kids at Cordova, Barcelona

'eddy', Group Show at M23, New York

'Death Knocks Twice' by Christian Roncea at Sedentary Enslavement, Lahaina, Hawai

'A Lady Cut the Hem of Her Dress to Not Wake Up Her Cat' by Natalie Ochoa at Catb

Next Page